January 27, 2010

"When dancing back to front, all dancers must remain upright — no sexual bending is allowed."

These dance instructions — from a Wisconsin high school — are being held up for mockery by The Smoking Gun and Drudge, but, frankly, I approve. Once you get past the silly term "sexual bending," it's pretty clear that the school officials are trying to protect the students from aggressive sexual touching.
... No hands on the dance floor with your buttocks touching your dance partner.
Think about it. That's a common enough kind of dancing that the school officials specified it? Obviously, some ground rules are needed for a school dance. No one is even saying your bodies cannot be fully touching in that upright position — the extremely sexy dancing that we Baby Boomers remember from high school... back in the days when teachers demanded to see "daylight" between the dancers.

19 comments:

KCFleming said...

Thank hip hop and progressive libertinism.

My kids' school banned this, too, but called it "grinding".

Isn't it funny that boomer's parents were right about Elvis the Pelvis?

Hoosier Daddy said...

Pants on the ground! Pants on the ground!

newscaper said...

Some front to front touching of bodies is one thing.

Grinding on each others thigh is another.

Backing up and bending over, mock doggie-style is quite another.

More power to 'em for trying to impose some minimal standards.

rhhardin said...

Maybe the girls like ballroom dancing classes but the boys didn't.

You'd never get the impression from dancing in formal dress that girls are soft, by the way.

Bob_R said...

Stop all that vulgar dancing and learn to tango! Unfortunately, the tango combines sex and skill. Not a combination that I remember from high school.

AllenS said...

Man, I was born too soon.

Fred4Pres said...

tango is refined civilized seduction and should be taught in school.

I tried and failed--I am a cha cha guy. Still, I see the beauty in it.

Mr. Bingley said...

I'm curious just how exactly one can dance (let alone even move) when the rules explicitly say that "both feet must remain on the dance floor at all times."

I guess Moonwalking would work...

WV: "comic" just about sums up these regulations, don't it?

traditionalguy said...

What happened to issuing free condoms at the door and turning out the lights? Seriously, it helps to set a standard. Then the kids who want to be safe and dance a litle can do so, and the sexually active can still fornicate in the back seat of their cars like their daddys used to do.

tim maguire said...

Though I question the use of the word "protect" since both partners tend to be enthusiastic about the whole thing, some dance moves are simply fully clothed sex. And that should happen behind the gym, not on the dance floor.

the gold digger said...

What happened to issuing free condoms at the door and turning out the lights?

It's the Milwaukee public schools that issue the condoms. Union Grove is - gosh! - 40 miles south of Milwaukee! The rules are completely different there!

Ignorance is Bliss said...

I blame Patrick Swayze.

ricpic said...

When dancing back to front...

A conga line? The bunny hop? Although it's stretching things to call that a dance. What other dance is danced back to front? Possibly the cha cha. But aren't all other dances front to front?

robinintn said...

Somehow the image of a guy bending a 15-year-old girl over, ensuring that he never has to see her face and that she is in an inferior position, then repeatedly slamming his dick into her, does bother me.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

The use of that fatally flawed font negates everything stated in that forsaken notice.

and dont call me frankly ;)

Anonymous said...

Anecdotal evidence alert...a friend volunteered to chaperone a middle school dance. Sixth through eighth graders were grinding on each other, pretty raunchy stuff going on. She kept going out to the dance floor, breaking it up, enduring disgusted and shocked looks from the students.

She finally appealed to the principal, standing about six feet away. He brushed it off with a shrug. "They're not hurting anything." He was probably enjoying the show.

Jason said...

The image of a guy bending a 15 year old girl over, putting her in an inferior position, ensuring he never has to see her face, and then repeatedly slamming his dick into her...

Bookmarked.

Joe said...

Where are you Kevin Bacon?

William said...

I'm against middle school children engaging in group sex at school dances. That said, it must be observed that for the past two hundred years adults have been dismayed at the sexual mores of the young. When the waltz was first introduced in Europe it caused the same amount of consternation as shown here. Perhaps, the shocking of grown ups is an integral part of all new dances. Wherever the adults draw the line, the kids move it two clicks to the left....The good news is that depravity is not a progressive condition. Most adolescents learn to value stability and affection in a relationship more than dry humping. They thus move away from such behavior except when they don't. The real challenge of adolescent sexuality is to pass through it without irrevocably screwing up your life.