June 18, 2012

"Obama picks John Kerry to play Romney in mock debate rehearsals."

That seems like a terrible idea!
“There is no one that has more experience or understanding of the presidential debate process than John Kerry,” said David Axelrod, Obama’s chief strategist. “He’s an expert debater who has a fundamental mastery of a wide range of issues, including Mitt Romney’s Massachusetts. He’s the obvious choice.”
Who should he have picked? And who should Romney pick to play Obama? I asked that second question out loud and Meade said "Rob Portman!" I see that Portman played Obama for John McCain. (And Portman played Lieberman for Dick Cheney in 2000.)

50 comments:

edutcher said...

Sounds like somebody wants to do a little negative branding on the Romster, trying to paint him as effete as Lurch.

The only one as effete as Lurch is Choom, so he'd be debating himself.

Who should play Barry in the Romster's rehearsals?

Who's the whitest white guy you can think of?

Bush 41?

The shade of Pat Moynihan?

rhhardin said...

Eric Holder ought to play Romney for Obama.

Palladian said...

Can't Romney somehow obtain one of Obama's teleprompters, and have Obama play himself?

jimbino said...

Of course he should have picked George Will, master of conservative philosophy and politics.

Or maybe even Pat Buchanan.

My name goes here. said...

I agree with Axelrod. John Kerry is a master debater.

Michael K said...

Shhhh.

Don't interrupt Obama when he is doing all the right things ! :)

wyo sis said...

Kerry: I'm not a winner, but I play one in debate practice.

Blue@9 said...

Kerry: I'm not a winner, but I play one in debate practice.


You win the thread.

Brian Brown said...

You have to understand the mentality of these amateurs.

They thought: Rich white guy from New Englad???

Kerry!

Awesome!!!!

bgates said...

And who should Romney pick to play Obama?

It would be difficult to find an exact match for Obama's keen wit, patriotism, and good character, but perhaps in some red state there's a junior college sociology instructor who's been jailed for bludgeoning a conservative student with one of Howard Zinn's books during a coke binge who would be willing to cut a deal for clemency from the governor.

Paddy O said...

Palladian, ha!

Holmes said...

Jimmy Carter ought to play Obama since Obama has been replaying his one man roadshow act for 3 years.

Hiyo!

Kansas City said...

I doubt that it makes much difference. Kerry is similar to Romney in some respects. The problem would be having to spend so much time with him.

More seriously, the candidates mostly waste the debate opporunities and just play if safe, trying to play out the clock without a mistake and getting off a few scripted line. This time, Obama is vulnerable because he has a record that Romney can use against him, if he is smart. But, Romney also needs to listen to whatever deceptions Obama offers and, gently, call him on them.

Michael Haz said...

Obama's handlers should have picked Ed Rendell to play Romney. Ferocious debater. Hard puncher.

Romney's handlers should pick Eric Cantor to play Barack Obama.

Jason (the commenter) said...

And who should Romney pick to play Obama?

I'm going with Webb Simpson or Bubba Watson.

David said...

John Edwards. He needs a little boost.

Hagar said...

In these TV debates I would think your opponent's style would be as important, if not more so, than the content of his remarks.

I don't see Lurch substituting for Mittens.

I'm Full of Soup said...

Didn't you do a post on meritocracy today? Kerry is Exhibit A on why we ain't a true meritocracy.

NotWhoIUsedtoBe said...

Howard Dean.

Blue@9 said...

In these TV debates I would think your opponent's style would be as important, if not more so, than the content of his remarks.

I agree with this. The main problem with Kerry is that he's a vain fool. Romney doesn't come off as vain or stupid.

This doesn't surprise me in the least though. It's hard to imagine that Obama's people have a realistic assessment of Romney. How could they? They (and pretty much all progressive true believers) sit in a bubble and they all agree that Romney is a vampire cultist. Their own guy is the philosopher king--how could they not underestimate Romney? Do you think anyone in the Romney camp is taking Obama lightly?

kcom said...

"Jimmy Carter ought to play Obama since Obama has been replaying his one man roadshow act for 3 years."

Have you heard the argument going around in some circles the last few days? It questions whether the job of president is too big for one man and perhaps something ought to change. All I can do is shake my head and laugh because I remember the exact same argument from the Jimmy Carter era. That's what some people were saying back then. It turns out the solution wasn't to change the system but rather to change the president. When Ronald Reagan was elected that argument disappeared. That shows it wasn't something about the job that was lacking, it was something about the man. The same is true with Obama.

Cincinnatus said...

Kerry? Bwahahaha. Well, at least Obama will pronounce "Genghis" correctly...

Paul said...

John Kerry? Why?

It it because he still has his hat?

Might as well pick Buffoon Biden to practice against.

Well as Napoleon said, "Do not interfere with your opponent when they are in the process of destroying themselves."

JAL said...

AA Who should he have picked?

Jon Stewart?

JAL said...

Well, at least Obama will pronounce "Genghis" correctly...

Not so fast there, Robin.

The CIC of the U.S.Marine corpsemen might stumble.

The Crack Emcee said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Crack Emcee said...

Obama picks John Kerry to play Romney in mock debate rehearsals.

Two rich, stiff, big-headed, generally uncomfortable white guys, with a propensity for making gaffes in an effort to show they empathize with us.

Seems logical to me.

Is Kerry in a cult?

Beta Rube said...

Who should Mitt pick? Is Bill Ayers busy?

Wince said...

And who should Romney pick to play Obama?

Duh, Bill Ayers.

Wince said...

Beta Rube,

A thousand pardons, you beat me.

John Althouse Cohen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
John Althouse Cohen said...

Rob Portman is a brilliant debate stand-in. He might have had a decisive effect on the 2000 election by prepping Bush. WaPo reported:

During the 2000 presidential campaign, the staff for then-Texas Gov. George W. Bush asked him to play the part of Democratic vice presidential candidate Joseph I. Lieberman in mock debates that the Bush team had arranged for Richard B. Cheney, its desired running mate. Portman proved so formidable that, before the last of Bush’s three debates, he found himself in the dining room of the Texas governor’s mansion, playing Al Gore against Bush. He had prepared for the practice session by watching tapes of virtually every Gore debate he could find.

“There were only about a dozen of us in that room,” remembers the campaign’s policy director, Joshua B. Bolten, who would later become director of the Office of Management and Budget and Bush’s White House chief of staff. “Rob really threw some nasty jabs at [Bush]. Then, while [Bush] was answering a question, Rob nonchalantly walked up to him and invaded his space. Bush asked: ‘What are you doing?’ Rob said something like, ‘I’m coming into your space.’ ”

Bush shook his head. “Gore’s never going to do that.”

“He might do it,” Portman said. “He’s done it in other debates.”

Days later, in the real debate, Gore rose from a stool and walked toward Bush. Ready for it, Bush did a mock double-take and smiled dismissively at him.

furious_a said...

Mitt Romney has neither a Magic Hat nor false recollections seared, seared into his memory. Nor did he marry his fortune.

Who's the whitest guy you can think of.

Michael Jackson...oh, wait, never mind, then Lester Holt.

Matt said...

The real story here is that they wanted someone extremely familiar with "Romney's Massachusetts".

They wanted someone familiar with the minutia of Romney's time as gov so they can continue their strategy of attacking his record there.

In Florida we're getting all kinds of misleading adds on that strain of thought (SHOCK: state with 4.75% unemployment creating jobs faster than states with 6-7% unemployment).

I think this could backfire.

DEEBEE said...

So is Portman better at playing a white old man than a black young man

gadfly said...

Kerry’s tales of “derring-do” extend to impressing gullible or willingly worshipful reporters with tales of his “secret” exploits in Cambodia. “Secret” because the Kerry campaign admits there is no paperwork anywhere to verify their man’s “missions” into the Heart of Darkness. How convenient!

The myth persists that Kerry, in his noisy, 50-foot swift boat (the last type of sea craft you’d use doing an agent insertion) slipped into Cambodian territory undetected and then back out again. Despite the fact the only thing quieter than the swift boat Kerry had, is a CH-53 helicopter at treetop level!

A sycophantic story in the Kerry-friendly Washington POST tells about a Kerry staffer hinting to the visiting reporter about a “secret compartment” in Kerry’s briefcase.

“He carries the black attaché everywhere,” the staffer whispered, several times. “Asked about it on several occasions, Kerry brushed it aside. Finally, trapped in an interview, he exhaled and clicked open the case.”

“Who told you?” he demanded as he reached inside. “My friends don’t know about this.”

Kerry pulls out a hat, a little mildewy. The green camouflage was fading and the seams fraying.

“My good luck hat,” Kerry said, happy to see it. “Given to me by a CIA guy as we went in for a special mission in Cambodia.”

“Kerry put on the hat, pulling the brim over his forehead. His blue, button-down shirt and tie clashed with the camouflage. He pointed his finger and raised his thumb, creating an imaginary gun. He looked silly, yet suddenly his campaign message was clear: citizen-soldier, linking patriotism to public service. It wasn’t complex after all; it was Kerry.

“He smiled and aimed his finger: ‘Pow.’”


http://militarycorruption.com/kerry3.htm

The Crack Emcee said...

When will you people learn?

When Mitt Romney was a college freshman, he told fellow residents of his Stanford University dormitory that he sometimes disguised himself as a police officer -- a crime in many states, including Michigan and California, where he then lived. And he had the uniform on display as proof.

So recalls Robin Madden, who had also just arrived as a freshman, the startling incident began when Romney called him and two or three other residents into his room, saying, "Come up, I want to show you something." When they entered Romney's room, "and laid out on his bed was a Michigan State Trooper's uniform."...

Said Madden in a recent interview, "He told us that he had gotten the uniform from his father," George Romney, then the Governor of Michigan, whose security detail was staffed by uniformed troopers. "He told us that he was using it to pull over drivers on the road. He also had a red flashing light that he would attach to the top of his white Rambler."

In Madden's recollection, confirmed by his wife Susan, who also attended Stanford during those years, "we thought it was all pretty weird. We all thought, 'Wow, that's pretty creepy.' And after that, we didn't have much interaction with him."


http://reason.com/blog/2012/06/08/mitt-romney-self-made-cop

The Crack Emcee said...

furious_a,

Mitt Romney has neither a Magic Hat nor false recollections seared, seared into his memory. Nor did he marry his fortune.

No, but he believes in a guy with a magic hat, and false recollections seared, seared into his memory which Romney accepts as his own. And both Romney and his "prophet" made their money through swindling people.

I don't know how any of you can look in a mirror after backing this fraud,...

SomeoneHasToSayIt said...

Whom among us doesn't love Kerry?

SomeoneHasToSayIt said...

I don't know how any of you can look in a mirror after backing this fraud,...

It's easy. We just consider the OTHER choice.

Then, it's a no-brainer.

Christopher in MA said...

In a serious vein, I remember reading somewhere that Romney should pick Newt to play Obama, under the theory that Romney needs to prep against someone who hates him and will be constantly on the attack.

IMO, he needs to find someone who can mimic all of Obama's qualities - passive-aggressiveness, ponderous speaking, outright lying and construction of straw men.

Maybe Jon Lovitz can do it. Solyndra. . .it created millions of green jobs! Yeah, that's the ticket!

Brian Brown said...


Days later, in the real debate, Gore rose from a stool and walked toward Bush. Ready for it, Bush did a mock double-take and smiled dismissively at him.


Bush is like so stupid, remember!?!?!!

Mr. Apropos said...

Romney should see if Alan Keyes is available. He's got some interesting ideas...but man, he can work a debate podium.

TomB said...

Sen Kerry? Was the guy who prepped Solicitor General Verrilli not available?

Joe said...

And who should Romney pick to play Obama?

Someone who is well versed in debate and who is willing to do anything to throw Romney off. They key is for Romney to be prepared for anything, not just Obama.

BarryD said...

If I were Obama, I'd look to the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition for mock debate partners.

If you're going to go down in flames, do it in STYLE!

And most of the women could probably do a better job than John Kerry. Even the ones who don't speak English.

BarryD said...

Who should Romney pick to play Obama?

That depends. Will Obama have a TelePrompter at the debate? Or will he have to think for himself?

SomeoneHasToSayIt said...

Easy to "play" Obama in debate. Simply do this:

Start sentence with "The notion that . . . "

Then insert any random "strawman" formulation.

Proceed from there, cynically assuming all listeners lack basic cognitive ability.

Easy as pie.

Michelle Dulak Thomson said...

I agree with JAL and Christopher in MA. Romney should debate Gingrich, and Obama should debate Jon Stewart.

The only snag is that Romney has already debated Gingrich a wearyingly long number of times. But Gingrich pretending to be Obama he has not. And the Newtster is probably still pissed off enough that he'd put some effort (and venom) into the practice.

Jason said...

It's silly to use Kerry, or any liberal. Obama should hire an ethical, hard-punching and very well-informed conservative and spar against that.

Kerry only has a clown-car concept of what Romney will say, and the facts he will muster in his defense. It's a classic case of intellectual inbreeding.

Want to learn to hit curveballs? Find a batting practice pitcher to throw curveballs at you. Not changeups that they think are curveballs.

Want to learn to play against the Ruy Lopez opening? Find someone who's really good at it, and spar against him.

This kind of intellectual inbreeding is what destroyed liberals.

Obama should hire someone who thinks like Paul Ryan, is just as well informed, swear him to secrecy, lock himself in a room, and just debate public policy with him all day, every day.

You can't learn to defeat conservative thought in a debate by arguing with another libtard.

The arrogance of these fuckers is just astounding.